Three sentence movie reviews–Zach and Miri Make a Porno


I think that, in between his hugely successful movies, Kevin Smith has a lot of free time on his hands and there is much sitting around thinking thoughts like, “What if I made a romantic comedy about two friends making porn?” Illegal substances may be involved, though Smith strikes me as someone a little too uptight to indulge. This was middle of the road Kevin Smith fare, with a lot of raunch, a few disgusting scenes and more evidence that under all his adolescent humor, he is really a squishy romantic at heart.

Three sentence movie reviews–Paranoid Park

Filmed in Portland with a lot of scenes near my work! The first twenty minutes of this movie have more dialog than Van Sant’s three previous movies combined. Much arty filming of skateborders, who remain youth that I have a soft spot for.

Note: a few years ago I decided to watch all of Gus Van Sant’s movies in order. This brings me up to date as of last year, now I have to see Milk. I split Van Sant’s movies into three categories: Early Portland, Commercial/Independent fare, and the “No Talking” Trilogy. With Paranoid Park and Milk, I seem to need a new category. In the meantime, my favorites from the current categories:

  • Early Portland: Drugstore Cowboy (probably a top 20 movie for me, beautifully filmed)
  • Commercial/Independent: To Die For (Nicole Kidman is good, but Matt Dillon and Joaquin Pheonix truly sparkle. Also, Illeana Douglas and Allison Foland are fabulous.)
  • No Talking: Gerry. (How could two guys walking around in the desert not talking be so mesmerizing?)

Three sentence movie reviews–Mala Noche.


I find it remarkable this film was made in 1985, it seems so contemporary and blatantly homosexual. Another of Van Sant’s “filmed in Portland where I work” although 20+ years before I started working there. Tim Streeter, who plays the main character is magnetic.

This is the first movie Gus Van Sant made. When I started my Gus Van Sant movie viewing project, it hadn’t been released on DVD and wasn’t really available, so I skipped it. Now you can see it as part of the Criterion Collection. I, for one, am very glad it is available.

photo from: www.imdb.com

Three sentence movie reviews–Rachael Getting Married.


An absolutely fabulous movie, long and languid with much to discuss for days afterward. The kind of movie about family dynamics and people with substance abuse problems that mainstream Hollywood could never make. It really feels as if you are attending this wedding.

poster from: http://www.ropeofsilicon.com/article/rachel_getting_married_has_a_poster

Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist


I didn’t like this as much as I liked the book, but it was a nice way to spend an evening. Kat Dennings is absolutely mesmerizing, so much so that Michael Cera faded into the background a bit. There are some laugh-out-loud funny lines in the movie, but if you have to choose one, read the book.

Oh! I forgot that they made a major plot point change between the book and the movie that I disagree with. The book is much better. Much.

poster from http://www.allposters.com/

Three sentence movie reviews–Kung Fu Panda.


A quick and entertaining animated feature with good life lessons for all. Finally, we learn how obsession with food can be used to one’s advantage. There were so many minor characters I felt they got a little lost in the plot line, but overall not a bad way to spend 92 minutes.

poster image from www.allposters.co.uk

Three sentence movie reviews–Love Actually.

The first time I saw this movie I was a bit lukewarm about it, while the rest of the country gushed; I find most of the stories either profoundly depressing or encompassing lust, not love. I thought I would watch it again to see if my initial impression was wrong. It wasn’t; Emma Thompson is the highlight.

poster from imdb.com

Three sentence movie reviews–Tell No One.


To quote Shawn Levy of the Oregonian: “An absolutely cracking thriller.” This is such a good movie you won’t mind that you have to read subtitles. Twenty minutes from the end I was thinking, “How in the world will they ever wrap this up?”

poster from: http://www.moviegoods.com/movie_poster/tell_no_one_2006.htm

Three sentence movie reviews–The Band’s Visit.


Another of those movies where the plot comes is conveyed less through dialogue and more through facial expressions. A charming, sweet, funny–Matt and I both howled with laughter during a scene–and sad movie that more people should see. Sometimes I think that movies are the only universal means of communication.

poster from: http://www.thebandsvisit.com/

Three sentence movie reviews–Ghost World

The main character thought that everyone and everything was so lame that by the end of the movie all I could think was, “You are totally lame and this movie is totally lame.” How in the heck did it end up on so many 2001 “best movie” lists?

Note. Movie was so lame I only needed two sentences.