Essay: In praise of Darlene

I watched the television show Roseanne for a few seasons and enjoyed it for its irreverent humor and the fact that the cast of characters didn’t have entirely new outfits every single episode. (The regular appearance of wardrobe items made the show more “real” to me than non-décor “décor” or the factory Rosanne worked in.) I have not seen the show since the early 90s, but the other day I was thinking about Darlene and how much she meant to me as an adolescent.
Becky, the Connor family’s older daughter, was the girl I knew I was supposed to be. Becky spent hours on her hair, fashion and makeup and did what she could to fit in with the popular people and to get boys to like her. She was “typical American girl” right down to the –y ending of her name, so popular with girls in the 80s.
Darlene was just Darlene. Not only did she sport that out-of-fashion first name, she was a tomboy, flopped onto the couch in her jeans and lacked any accessories or hairstyles to perk up her personality. Darlene really just wanted to be Darlene. She was flip and funny and found most of the things her sister did ridiculous. I will forget Darlene asking Becky about kissing.
“Why do you have your mouth open?” Darlene asked in response to Becky’s illustrative pose.
“So he can put his tongue in my mouth,” Becky replied to Darlene’s disgust. As someone who at that point had never been kissed, I related to her reaction.
Though Darlene’s life appealed to me, I followed the Becky path by reading Teen Magazines for several years of my adolescence. I stopped when I realized that every other month I was treated to an article describing how to give myself a manicure. I did my best to make myself attractive, though I always felt—much like Becky—that I never had quite the right clothing. My name even ended with the appropriate –y ending. I wasn’t overtly trying to fit in and run with the popular people, but I certainly didn’t want to stray far enough from the norm to draw attention to myself as being weird.
Adolescent culture promotes conformity so strongly—in your own crowd, at the very least, and ideally the greater group. I had many examples from television of how I should act and the message was generally the same: do what you can to fit in; boys won’t like you if you are too different. But there were beacons of hope scattered here and there on the landscape. Darlene was one.
To this day I have incredibly warm feelings for Sara Gilbert, perking up whenever she appears on screen. Like many people, I got through adolescence as best I could. Under my thin adolescent veneer of self-confidence I looked everywhere for examples of how to be. I got lessons from the usual: friends, family, teachers, books. It was nice, every once in a while, to see examples in the media of who I might be.
Postscript. My time watching Roseanne was short, lasting only a few years until I got my first job or possibly my first boyfriend. But the show was on for quite some time and I have no idea how Darlene turned out. Did she stay cool? I hope so, but I’m not willing to watch the entire series to find out.

Three sentence movie reviews: Hamlet (2000)


It was a mistake to follow along with my copy of Hamlet as I watched this movie as vast parts of the play (including, most egregiously, the scene including the famous lines “Alas, poor Yorick, I knew him, Horatio”!!!!) are not in this version of the movie. Ethan Hawk has those great brooding eyes and he made a pretty good Hamlet, but I found Julia Styles’ (and I know this was not her fault, but still) rave-inspired clothing to be overly distracting to her performance. The New York City setting worked, though I found the “corporation”rather than “country” setting to be a bit off.*

*Fun fact for Casey Affleck fans: It is Casey Affleck himself who plays Fortinbras, the eventual “winner” of it all. Though we only see his picture, never the actor himself.

Three sentence movie reviews: The Artist


I loved this movie and have enthusiastically recommended it to many people. Their reaction is similar to my own before I saw it, namely: “Isn’t that the one where they don’t talk AT ALL?” And yes, it is, but it is also a wonderful movie, full of humor and drama and complex characters and a delightful dog; which means that you should go and see it, despite the fact that there is NO TALKING AT ALL.

ps. It’s a good one to take your church-going grandmother too. She will like it a lot.

A Walk to Vancouver

A sunny day and an afternoon movie date in Vancouver. How best to get there? I could drive, but the traffic will be awful. I could ride, but then would have to get the bike back somehow and post-movie plans complicate this. Or! I could walk! Friend Kelly agreed to drive me back (we had another event to go to after our movie) and so I walked.

One of my favorite signs. How many miles of Interstate 5 are in Oregon? Why 308.

I could see all three mountains. Here, a shining Mount Hood.

A tiny view of Mount St. Helens peeking over Vancouver.

Mt. Adams was somewhere there, it just wouldn’t show up for its picture.
Thanks to Kelly for making my nice walk possible.

Essay: Nerdfighters!

Matt and I are Nerdfighters, and we were with our people for a few hours on Sunday. Nerdfighters are fans of John and Hank Green, two brothers who post video logs weekly on their YouTube channel. If I posted a regular video log people would have exciting insights to my laundry processes and the fact that I go through long stages of avoiding housework. But John Green is a writer of young adult books and Hank Green—among other things—plays guitar and writes funny songs and so their video posts are fun and funny and they have tons of fans.
The Vlogbrothers (it seems odd to call them the Green Brothers) are unapologetically smart and embrace their intelligence in a way I don’t often see on the Internet. Their full-on embrace of all their nerdy passions attract other nerds. There’s a vocabulary all its own (Nerdfighters, Nerdfiteria, French the Llama, etc.) and a hand signal and t-shirts and challenges to do good things in the world. John Green’s book tour (with special guest Hank Green) was our first chance to see other Nerdfighters. I had been warned by a friend who saw an earlier show in Virginia that the audience consisted of people much younger than themselves and indeed the majority of our audience looked to be in high school and the rest looked to be in college. The other people were the parents of the high schoolers and a smattering of people like Matt and myself, “actual adult” Nerdfighters.
The show was a mish-mash: a visit from a sock puppet voiced by Hank, a section from John Green’s new book, Hank playing a few songs. After his second song, an audience member yelled “encore” and Hank nicely explained that he was just getting started and that the encore would come at the end of the show. John Green talked about how he came to write his latest book, emphasizing that we have a limited amount of time on earth and using it to follow the lives and romances of the cast members of the Jersey Shore might not be the best use of that limited time.
In some ways it was not at all like a book reading or a concert. During one song Hank stopped abruptly, apologized and explained about the “panic bubble” that sometimes emerges when he plays live for people. There was also a question and answer session where the brother still talking when the time ran out was given a slight shock, something the audience found hilarious
The people attending? Nerds. I just watched a video of the encore song and someone observed that Nerdfighters have something of a “look.” They weren’t sure what it was, but there was one. I would have to agree. People had clearly dressed up for the show, but in a way that struck me as vaguely Canadian in that if the outfit was fun, the colors were off. Or perhaps the colors were great, but the hair was greasy, and not in a “hip” greasy way. I eavesdropped on conversations and found them significantly nerdy. And everyone was so nice. The lines were long and people just patiently waited to get to whatever they were getting to. No one danced during the songs until the very end when someone yelled, “Can we dance?” loud enough so Hank could hear it. Hank gave his blessing and people leaped to their feet. Did you miss that? The audience was so polite that they waited for permission to dance at their own concert.
I watched people throughout the show. There was a skinny high-school looking guy with a haircut and clothes-matching ability that pointed toward a possible homosexual identity. He stood to the side of the theater and danced with himself during every song. There was a somewhat large girl so overcome by the final song she squealed and danced to the front of the venue, her curly hair streaming behind her, tamed by a shiny scarf. There was the girl behind me who was a fan of John Green’s book Paper Towns and knew every word to every song. There was the woman in the front row who happily held the video camera for the final number and then patiently waited for someone to collect it. There were the four girls, spotty and a bit awkward wearing jeans and red shirts emblazoned with John Green’s face on a pizza.
I’ve had enough years to enjoy what makes me nerdy and embrace it rather than wishing I was cooler. But during my years in high school and college I would have loved to have a worldwide group of fellow Nerds to hang with, even if our hanging was mostly virtual. Thank you Vlogbrothers for making nerdy fun.

Requiem: Tempeh Pizza Burgers Recipe

In going through my recipe three-ring binder, I was resistant to throwing out this recipe, even though I haven’t made it since the mid-90s. I think it is because this was the first thing I remember making with tempeh and it was delicious and filling, something that a lot of my vegetarian recipes hadn’t been supplying. It was a recipe that took a lot of steps though, so I don’t think I made it ever again, preferring to pan-fry my tempeh and season it with soy sauce.

Should you so desire to make tempeh pizza burgers of your own you can squint at that picture or seek out the cookbook.

Requiem: Jar

Okay, I find this ridiculous, but I couldn’t just recycle this jar without first taking a picture. This is a glass Miracle Whip jar, from the era when all condiments came in jars, not plastic bottles.

It also has masking tape and the remains of a label in my grandmother’s handwriting. This was the reason it was hard to let go of. I have many other examples of her handwriting, but I liked the link of the jar across generations.

I’ve added my own label.
Whew. Pictures taken, now jar can be recycled.

New Loo Ceremony.

The school took part in the First Flush ceremony for the newest Portland Loo. As usual, adding children to the mix was delightful.

Listening to the speeches.

Waiting to sing our songs

Tara is ready to lead the 4/5 chorus.

After singing, (“New Loo” performed by the 4/5 chorus to the tune of “Blue Moon.” Also, “Skip to my Loo” by the entire school) we did the first flush by doing a massive “all school” push that began in the K/1 grade blend and traveled up through the grades. Each student carefully–for the most part–pushed the arm of the student next to them all the way to the end of the line…

…where Julie passed off the flush to Tara and she ran inside and pushed the button. This resulted in a great photo that was in the Saturday Community Section of the Oregonian. Sadly, the photo is not included with the web site article.

The Oregonian’s video (which sadly includes an ad) has a slide show and the Skip to My Loo song.

Books read in January 2012

There was a lot of reading this month, but it’s January in Portland, Oregon. This means cold and rainy. Scrolling through, I see that there were several YA selections, some of them quite good. Quite good YA selections can be read in a 24 hour period easily. Would you like to read a very good YA book? Pick up The Fault in Our Stars by John Green. You won’t be sorry.

Read
Bunheads
Sophie Flack.
This was a moderately interesting novel about a NYC ballerina. I wasn’t in love with the story, but the insider information was interesting. It did not, however, solve the ballet mystery I’ve had for years which is: why do dancers wear their tights on the outside of the leotards when rehearsing? This makes no sense to me.
Sixty-Odd
Ursula K. LeGuin
Poems, she means. But I think the title is a play on age too. Some good ones, some of which will be appearing soon on my poetry post.
The Disciples
James Mollison
I. LOVE. THIS. BOOK. Just when you think there is nothing new anyone can do in photography, along comes Mollison, who decided to take portraits of people attending concerts–in London, in the US, in Italy. Then he chose 10 representative images from each concert and knitted them into a panorama of concert goers. The Lady Gaga goers were particularly gaga-eque, and the Katie Perry fans were brightly colored, but I have to say my favorite was the Rod Steward layout, with ten 55-plus men with spiky blonde hair and a good bit of fat on them. It’s an incredibly delightful book to page through, but I found it even more fun when I read the synopsis of the photo shoots, found in the back of the book, and then looked at the pictures. This book is highly recommended. If your library doesn’t have this, seek it out in the bookstore or even purchase it for yourself. It is that good!
Dash & Lily’s Book of Dares
Rachel Cohen and David Levithan
Matt and I read aloud.
I think “David Levithan, read aloud” is even more delightful than “David Levithan read to oneself.” I went on a campaign this holiday season recommending this book to people as a very good holiday read, but alas, only Matt experienced its holiday charms. Perhaps you could put it on your calendar for next year…
The Order of the Stick: Snips, Snails and Dragon’s Tales
Rich Burlew
Matt and I read aloud
Tales unrelated to the OOTS story, but still fun. We even got an OOTS version of Hamlet, just after we read and viewed the play.
50 Miles from Tomorrow
William Iggiagruck Hensley
Read for Kenton Book Club
I enjoyed the detail of the author’s early years in his small Alaskan village. I was less interested in his fight to retain native lands as Alaska became a state, though I do think it was a very important thing. The natives of Alaska came out a lot better than the natives of the lower 48 states. Overall, an interesting read.
The Fault in Our Stars
John Green
When I was a young teenager, I went though a phase of reading books where horrible things happened to protagonists: going blind, getting cancer, father’s diagnosed with Alzheimers Disease, boyfriends dying, etc. I suspect that reading these “cancer books” about other teenagers going through really awful things helped me navigate my own adolescence. After all, everything around and including me might be changing, but at least I still had my sight, health and a fully mentally functioning father. So “cancer books” have a dear place in my heart. I myself have had the luck to never have anyone close to me battle cancer (knock on wood) so I can still freely read books about cancer and enjoy them without bringing my own experience to them.
I found this to be a (this word seems wrong, but it isn’t) delightful “cancer book” full of much humor, interesting insight and just the right amount of tugging on heartstrings. John Green has written yet another wonderful book on many levels. The NPR review mentioned that Green “writes for youth rather than to them and the difference is palpable.” Well said. Are you a young adult? You’ve probably already read it? Are you a Nerdfighter? I know you’ve read it. Are you an adult? Put it on you list.
Lips Touch Three Times
Laini Taylor
This is about the grapic novel-to-text ratio I appreciate. Taylor’s fascination with female-centered mystical Eastern European-esqe settings appeal to me and I gobbled up these stories.
What Now?
Ann Patchett
Friend Kelly hooked me up with this book!
Five stars for the text, which was an adaptation of a graduation speech Patchett gave at her alma mater. You might think that you don’t want to read a graduation speech, but you would be wrong.
Two stars for the copious amounts of photos inserted into the text. I understand that they were fleshing things out, but I could have done with out the double turning of pages necessitated by two page photo spreads. I also found the photos incredibly cliched. But the writing was magical. I read the whole thing in about an hour or so, which means you should grab and read.
Naomi & Ely’s No Kiss List
Rachel Cohen & David Levithan
Mostly because the Naomi character was incredibly annoying (what’s up with all her wingdings in place of actual words? Not cool and hip. Nuh-uh!) I did not really like this book. Ely was a bit better, but not much.
The Girl Who Fell From the Sky
Heidi Durrow
Read for Kenton Book Club
Multnomah County Library’s Everybody Reads Selection 2012
I drank this novel–set in Portland–down quickly and greatly enjoyed the city-specific details. It wasn’t the weightiest book, but I thought it particularly compelling when discussing issues of biculturalism.
I am Number Four
Pittacus Lore
YA Sci-Fi that was apparently made into a movie so horrible that Roger Ebert’s review is actually quite funny to read. This book was compelling enough that I put off the planned evening activities to finish it. It had good themes: retaining cultural identity when living within another culture; growing into you powers (in this case the character actually had powers, being from another planet); fitting in and putting down roots. It had teen romance without being sappy and an adult character who was helpful, not harmful. I’ve already got the next book on reserve.
Started and Did Not Finish
Some books this month, but I neglected to write them down. So sorry.

Poem for January 2012: Dawn Revisited

Here it is: http://writersalmanac.publicradio.org/index.php?date=2003/08/28

I chose this poem because in some ways it is a sufficient “new year, new start” sort of poem. However, though the light is returning, we are still in the dark of winter. “How good to RISE IN SUNLIGHT!” I would project forcefully at the dark, rainy sky as I walked to the train in the morning. Aside from using this poem to chastise the earth for something that is perfectly natural, I also greatly enjoyed the phrase “prodigal smell of biscuits.”