Three sentence movie reviews: It’s a Wonderful Life


Matt had never seen this and while he started the movie heckling, the charms of the holiday staple won him over quickly. By the end, he was a convert. What’s the holiday without this movie?

poster from: http://www.impawards.com/1946/its_a_wonderful_life.html

Three sentence movie reviews: Role Models


This movie was full of things I don’t usually like: foul-mouthed children, infantile adults, and an over-sharing recovering junkie. However, despite all the above elements present and various levels of inappropriateness, I quite enjoyed this. I’m pretty sure this has to do with the fact that it is the-always-fun-to-watch Paul Rudd and Jane Lynch carrying out the inappropriate behavior.

poster from: http://www.impawards.com/2008/role_models.html

Three sentence movie reviews: 127 Hours


This, despite the solo forearm amputation that you know is coming,* was one of the most uplifting movies I’ve seen this year. James Franco is mesmerizing and the soundtrack is an integral part of the movie. Be sure to watch the credits all the way to the end to read the important statement about legal mountain biking.

poster from: http://www.impawards.com/2010/one_hundred_twenty_seven_hours.html

*If you can’t hack that scene–and believe me, if I could make it through it, you most likely can–just Google to find out how long it is and then leave the theater for that amount of time.

Three sentence movie reviews: Sex and the City II


After the Liza Minnelli cameo is over*, this is an endlessly long and boring move that is incredibly gauche in its excesses. I had plenty of time to think about and feel sorry for Carrie, Charlotte and Miranda all who seem to be desperately clinging to their youth in a way that makes them highly unattractive. Samantha seems to have made some deal with the devil in that she is much older than the others, but yet manages to look much less plastic and also younger.

poster from: http://www.impawards.com/2010/sex_and_the_city_two_ver3.html

*seriously, watch until she does her dance number and then turn the movie off. There is nothing here for you.

Three sentence movie reviews: Extract


Overall, this was a so-so movie but it did two things well. It had a very accurate depiction of factory worker life (at least it was similar to the factory I once worked in) and the various character actors were fun to watch. There were a few funny moments, but it wasn’t really a laugh riot.

poster from: http://www.impawards.com/2009/extract_ver6.html

Three sentence movie reviews: Pride and Prejudice


After watching the long miniseries, this went by in a flash. I did not take to this Mr. Darcy, but did enjoy the acting of everyone else. If you don’t have time to invest in the miniseries (but you do, trust me, you do) this will do in a pinch.

poster from: http://www.impawards.com/2005/pride_and_prejudice.html

Three sentence movie reviews: The Town


The movie that asks the question: If you are dating a charming townie who wants you to go away with him and then it turns out he’s part of the band of bank robbers who kidnapped you, should you go away with him?* I found this to be a very fun action/romance which was well acted in all corners. It helps that Ben Affleck (a good director, who I would like to see more of behind the camera instead of in front of it) was playing the classic Ben Affleck character, which he does well.

poster from: http://www.impawards.com/2010/town_ver2.html

*In fact when I asked the question to Matt the following conversation ensued:

PCC: What if you were dating a nice guy and it turned out that he was a bank robber who kidnapped you?

MAJ: I would say that’s not a good sign and you probably should break up.

PCC: But what if HE wasn’t the one who kidnapped you, but one of the other guys did and he was didn’t want to do it?

MAJ: I think that he still has some problems.

PCC: But what if he was really nice and wanted to change his ways?

MAJ (sighing): I’m so glad I’m not a woman.

PCC: Why?

MAJ: Because we just sleep with the bad girls. We don’t try and make a life with them.

Three sentence movie reviews: Bruno


I think Sacha Baron Cohen is a genius, but I personally find his comedic humor cruel and thus, unfunny. Still, the variety of settings “Bruno” visited and made fun of people was impressive. Due to the amount of nakedness, I spent a lot of time contemplating how hard it must have been for Cohen to remove the copious amounts of very dark hair he naturally possesses.

poster from: http://www.impawards.com/2009/bruno.html

Three sentence movie reviews: Pride and Prejudice (2005)


Inexplicably set in the 1860s, I spent a lot of the movie contemplating just how big the women’s sleeves were. Aldous Huxley, (of Brave New World fame) co-wrote the script and I found Lawrence Oliver to be a delightful Mr. Darcy. Not surprisingly, considering we’re talking Hollywood here, the story was changed a bit, the most egregious example being the shifting of the role of Lady Catherine de Bourgh’s confrontation with Elizabeth Bennett near the end of the film.

poster from: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0032943/