Category: Three Sentence Movie Reviews

Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw is a Punctuated Film Title

The review:

Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw* is ably directed by David Leitch and a worthy addition into the Fast & Furious enterprise.** Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham are a great anti-buddy pair while Idris Elba makes a scene chomping (in a good way) villain. The movie does thing thing where the characters travel all over the globe*** in order to boost its international box office draw, and they end up in “Samoa”**** where a bunch of Samoan men somewhat alleviate the lack of Vin Diesel.*****

The verdict: Good

Cost: $8.35
Where watched: Regal City Center Stadium 12, when I should have been doing other things

Consider also watching:

Further sentences:

*The double ampersand in the title might be some sort of shark jumping indication for this franchise
**Good lord, is there anything in this world so ridiculously entertaining as a Fast & Furious movie (that is not 2 Fast 2 Furious or The Fast and the Furious Tokyo Drift)?
***They seem to appear in these new locations as if by magic or Star Trek transponder; even air travel is too slow for the Fast & Furious bunch.
****Hawaii gets the role of Samoa in this film.
*****Though I like many things about this installment of the franchise, Mr. Diesel is, and has always been, my reason for watching.

Favorite IMDB trivia item:

Helen Mirren reprises her role from The Fate of the Furious (2017) as Shaw’s mother. She originally landed the role after she had indicated her desire to be part of the franchise one day, and the producers were happy to accommodate her.

The Farewell is Well Worth Your Time

The review:

Lulu Wang’s The Farewell is a quiet bit of funny and sad as we watch Billi (Awkwafina) come to terms with her Chinese grandmother’s terminal cancer diagnosis.* Shuzhen Zhao (Nai Nai—the grandmother) is a delight, full of vim and opinions and ways to get rid of the negative energy. It’s a movie full of moments that weave together into a loving portrait of a family spread far apart by geography but with a very close bond.

The verdict: Recommended

Cost: $6.00
Where watched: The Hollywood Theatre, with S. North (who paid, because I forgot my wallet)

Consider also watching:

Further sentences:

*Complicating the diagnosis: in China it’s common to withhold the diagnosis from the patient so everyone must act as if the family is only gathering for a family wedding.

Favorite IMDB trivia item:

In addition to writing and directing, Lulu Wang also plays piano on the film’s soundtrack.

A Serious Man is Full of Serious Expressions

The review:

Ethan and Joel Coen are not in any hurry to tell Larry Gopnik’s story in A Serious Man which makes for a meditative viewing experience. The gradual decay Mr. Gopnik’s life is expertly captured by Michael Stuhlbarg* and his misfortune lays the foundation for our entertainment. It’s a slow-moving movie in nearly every way, but constantly amusing and the period details are great.**

The verdict: Good

Cost: Netflix monthly fee ($8.99)
Where watched: at home

Consider also watching these Coen favorites:

Further sentences:

*He has such good facial expressions!
**Also well captured: the amount of profanity spoken in early adolescence. I suspect the ages of 12—15 are peak profanity for most youth.

Favorite IMDB trivia item:

The Coen Brothers stated that the opening scene was nothing more than a little short that they made up to get the audience in the proper mood, and that there is no meaning behind it.

Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood…is Too Long.

The review:

Quentin Tarantino’s Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood is the story of a friendship* between two men that had me shifting in my seat at the 90 minute mark and wondering for the next 71 minutes what all the other people in the theater were interested in. I’m on record of not being a fan of Mr. Tarantino** but man, this movie had too much movie for what it was saying.**** Both Pitt and DiCaprio bring great performances, the period detail was great, and still: No.

The verdict: Skip

Cost: $8.00 (Hollywood Theater Member pricing!)
Where watched: Hollywood Theater with friend Kelly

Consider watching these other movies set in the 60s:

Further sentences:

*I don’t think it can really be called a friendship when one person is paying the other, but we have no word for that. Frempolyment? Employship?
**Good things he does: dialog (though not so much in this movie); music; period detail. Problems I have with him: his movies are too damn slow; the films I’ve seen have the same structure that ends in too much violence; the violence is somewhat cartoonish, which leaves me ill physically and spiritually.***
***In my screening, the violence actions directed at women in the big scene at the end had several audience members expressing bro-like appreciation in a way that would not have been out of place at a gang rape. That made sitting through that gory scene that much worse.
****All of the Sharon Tate scenes could have been cut, and just about every tense scene went on long enough to have the tension transition to irritation.

Favorite IMDB trivia item:

As the Tate party enters the El Coyote restaurant for dinner, Sharon Tate and Jay Sebring discuss a movie premiere they can see taking place further down Beverly Blvd. at an erotic movie theater. “They have premieres for dirty movies?” asks Sharon. The theater in question is the Eros, a real adult theater of the time. The building still exists, though it is now a repertory cinema called the New Beverly Cinema, and it is owned by Quentin Tarantino.

Veronica Mars: The Best Movie for Marshmallows

The review:

The inception of Rob Thomas’ Veronica Mars* ranks as one of the few great movie-related surprises of my adult life.** It’s a movie with a lot of fan service, but it also has a credible plot and we get to check in on our favorite characters from the TV show, now firmly in their adult lives. A 100-minute movie can’t be as satisfying as the 64 episodes that came before it, but when you think something’s over and it comes back to life, that’s some kind of magic.

The verdict: Recommended

Cost: We have a DVD that may have come from the Kickstarter campaign?
Where watched: at home, with Matt***

Consider also watching:

Further sentences:

*The movie, not to be confused with the series of the same name.
**The other two: Before Sunset, Before Midnight
***Matt was around as I watched the three seasons this month. He remembered a lot more about each episode than I did. This was the only thing he sat through with me this time around.

Favorite IMDB trivia item:

Funded in large part by a campaign on Kickstarter.com, breaking all of the site’s records up to April, 2013. Some of the accomplishments were: Fastest project to reach one million dollars. Fastest project to reach two million dollars. All-time highest-funded project in the film category. Third highest-funded project in Kickstarter history. Most project backers of any project in Kickstarter history.

Veronica Mars Season 3: The Best Character Development

The review:

Veronica Mars Season 3 is hampered by the fact that only 12 episodes were ordered and then 8 more were added, so there is no through-line mystery. But no matter, this season is the best season to see how the characters’ best and worst qualities are working for them as they head toward being functioning adults.* There are mysteries, more new characters and a gasp-inducing fight scene that always has me questioning the bad-boy aesthetic.

The verdict: Recommended.

Cost: Currently streaming on Hulu, also available at your library and in DVD box sets
Where watched: at home

Consider also watching:

Further sentences:

*In this round of viewing it’s also the season where I realized that while I would want to be on Veronica Mars’ good side, she would be a hard person to be friends with. And a terrible person to be in a relationship with.

Favorite IMDB trivia item:

Creator Rob Thomas said that Ryan Hansen’s character Dick Casablancas was not originally meant to be a series regular. He was first cast for the second episode, as a nameless, rich Neptune resident with one line (“Logan!”). Thomas said that they read many young actors for the line, and when it came down to a choice between Hansen or another actor, they cast Hansen purely because he had “good hair”.

Veronica Mars Season 2: The Best Witty Banter

The review:

Veronica Mars Season 2 doesn’t have the excellent season-long mystery that Season 1 does*; what it excels in is Logan/Veronica banter. It’s also the season where we see the extent of the corruption in her town of Neptune, California. At this point the cast has really gelled and easily absorbs a few new characters.

The verdict: Recommended

Cost: Currently streaming on Hulu, also available at your library and in DVD box sets
Where watched: at home

Consider also watching:

Further sentences:

*Though Season 2’s main plot arc is worthy; it’s just not as nuanced as Season 1

Favorite IMDB trivia item:

The sticker of the black circle with the bananas in the middle on Veronica’s locker is the album cover of The Dandy Warhols. The album features the theme song “We Used to Be Friends”.
(Fun fact: Matt his his own version of this song he sings as the opening credits roll.)

Veronica Mars Season 1: the Best Mystery

The review:

Rob Thomas created Veronica Mars, and I will be forever thankful. This show has always been hard to sum up in a way that makes people want to watch it* and it’s also a show worthy of watching, especially if you care about young women coming of age.** The first season has the best season-long mystery, and it also quickly sets the foundation what’s to come including tense drama, funny quips, the best dad-daughter relationship on TV, excellent (and trying) friendships, the best bunch of side characters, and a first-name portmanteau that fans (aka Marshmallows***) are still invoking all these years later.

The verdict: Recommended

Cost: Currently streaming on Hulu, also available at your library and in DVD box sets****
Where watched: at home

Consider also watching:

Further sentences:

*Unfortunately, Nancy Drew has cornered the market on the term “girl detective” which means when you mention Veronica is the daughter of a P.I. and is trying to figure out who killed her best friend, everyone immediately goes to a very 50s place. Whereas this is a darker, early-2000s place.
**Things we talk about now, that we didn’t when the show first aired in 2004: how the trauma Veronica experienced changed her, for good and bad.
***Fans are called Marshmallows because of a thing Veronica’s friend Wallace says in the first episode
****Because you get extras and also because it has the original opening to the pilot that was not aired, but is much better.

Favorite IMDB trivia item:

UPN, the network that aired this show, was concerned during early episodes that viewers would confuse Teddy Dunn and Jason Dohring, who play Duncan and Logan. A color code was created where Dunn wore blues, and Dohring wore earth tones. The color code was maintained for the duration of the series.
(Fun fact: my coworker said she still never could keep them straight.)

Spider-Man: Far From Home is a Properly Adolescent Superhero Movie

The review:

John Watt’s Spider-Man: Far From Home brims with hard choices for one very reluctant superhero.* Tom Holland continues to prove he’s the best Spider-Man ever as he makes plans to spend a summer getting away from his neighborhood and the big superhero shoes he’s stepped into since the events of Avengers: Endgame.** But that wouldn’t make for a very entertaining movie for us, now would it?***

The Verdict: Recommended

Cost: $10.00
Where watched: Baghdad Theater

Consider also watching:

Further sentences:

*He is, after all, sixteen.
**He just wants to see Europe with his friends and maybe tell MJ (a delightfully frowny Zendaya) how he feels. The teen romance was totally on point in this film.
***Not to fear. Things go wrong. Spider-Man has to save the day. There are funny and clever parts.

Faviorte IMDB trivia item:

In the film, Spider-Man mentions Captain Marvel, which marks the first time a MCU character referred to Carol Danvers by that name.