Tag: funny

Three things from the paper.

Ads like these make me very angry.  I dislike the pressure to look a certain way, especially after putting your body through the reverse boot camp that is the process of creating life.  I also hate how the model’s torso is stretched out to make her look thinner.  And I hate that three surgical procedures (any of which could kill you) are crammed into one day.   When I was growing up, my father often bought the Sunday Oregonian (which was available in Boise) and the plastic surgery ads always disturbed me.  The Idaho Statesmen didn’t have plastic surgery ads.  But I bet it does now.

This is the biggest “duh” statement of the day.

And this just made me laugh.  It reminds me of the “learn multiplication facts AND have fun!” nonsense.

One letter’s journey to the wrong side of the country.

This arrived at work.  It was sent from New Jersey.  
Josias Campusano-Polanco?  Doesn’t work at my school.
105 Clark St?  105 is the street number of my building, but we’re not located on Clark Street.
Roselle, NJ 07203-2504?  None of those come close to matching the city, state and zip. (the 7,  2, & 0 match in that digit order, but nothing else)
So this letter traveled from New Jersey to my work in Portland, Oregon just because our street address is 105.  Weird.  I was so amused I wrote the recipient a note on the back of the envelope before sending it on its way.

The wit that is contained in the 12 Bottle Bar

I purchased the 12 Bottle Bar book because I’m interested in building a home bar and doing it with only 12 bottles seems like a grand idea.  I had no idea the authors would be so amusing.  They also feature other amusing authors, such as Sam Greenspan, who tells us about “11 Drinks Not to Order for the Opposite Sex.”  This paragraph in particular amused me.

Not quite what the headline writer was going for.

I picture Meriwether Lewis and William Clark, resplendent in their explorer’s gear, sitting in front of a computer with worried expressions.  What’s this box? It’s so bright and shiny. It’s a web? Webs are much sturdier now than they used to be.  Have spiders gotten strong? 

(But really it’s a story about Lewis and Clark college and their difficulties with Yik Yak.)

Amusing mail at work.

The Oregon Department of Education apparently has some alternative spelling of “Emerson” they find preferable.  I see this spelling a lot and I don’t understand where it comes from as there is no famous “Emmerson”.  Just old Ralph Waldo.  One “m”.

This just made me laugh. 
Casting call: We need a buttoned-up type to look like a very annoyed librarian.  No botox. The more disappointed, the better.

(Note that I know a lot of librarians and they don’t look like this at all.)